s​/​t

by Night Loner

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Dave G Raw, Impassioned dirty music for horrible people. Five Stars Favorite track: Filthy Fucking.
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about

Recorded by Jacob at his house

credits

released September 27, 2016

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Night Loner Austin, Texas

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Track Name: Filthy Fucking
Our sex is violent and deranged, just like I am, just like you're not supposed to be
You hate me, I hate me, we are something the world shouldn't see
I don't care about anything other than you, which to you means absolutely nothing
Our sweat and pain bleeds through everything I do, and everything you name
Our sex becomes depression, fucking is my cure, you are my salvation
Regret fills us when I fill you, but yet our lives remain empty
You don't care about me other than when you need me to make you suffer
Ambition is purpose; if you breath I break if you break I die
Nothing will rape you like I did; remain beneath me
I am angry, you are depressed, our roles switch when we fuck

I am nothing
You are nothing
We are nothing
Love is nothing
Filthy Fucking
Track Name: Sexually Frustrated
Out out the town
Out for a prowl
Everyone's a target
Who's coming now?
I force you below me
Swallow my pride
And feel how quickly
I kill your sex drive
I'm frustrated
Sexually frustrated
Constantly contemplate
Constantly masturbate
Hopefully Soon
I'll leave this fucking room
Track Name: I Love You, So Much
What the fuck have you done to your arms?
You don't see who you hurt when you self harm
It's okay to feel nothing. Let's feel it together
I can't stand to watch you fall, but I'm no better
Hey come here and lay your head down
We will tame this monster right now
Can't you see what you've done to me
Oh please god this isn't happening
What the fuck have you done to your body?
How could you do this to me, or anybody?
I never got the chance to say I love you, so much
I love you, so much
Track Name: Pipe Dreams
Promised everything from the start
I'm only 20 and it's already falling apart
Shit it doesn't matter what I do
To get ahead you have to be used
Your future is not what it seems
All you've got are fucking pipe dreams
Track Name: Note
Read the note
Burn your hair
Start to wonder
Why you don’t care
It all seemed
Like nothing
The red daze
Is coming
Burn your throat
With alcohol
Treat memories
Like they’re not there at all
Every morning
You wake up
Your feelings
Won’t erupt
She took
Your pride
It wasn’t taken
In stride
Think back
To a time
When everything
Wasn’t a sign
You tie
The rope
She left you
With no hope
The last image
You see
Is a frame
Of your disease
Her picture
Is black and white
You exit the world
Without a fight

She goes to
The scene
It is all
So obscene
Reads the note
Starts to cry
You just wanted
To die
She took
Too much
You didn’t give
Enough
Your mind
Made her leave
Memories come
Like through a sieve
Think back
To a time
When everything
Wasn’t a sign
She stares at
The body
She stares at
Your body
She stares at
A body
Your mind was
Already rotting
There was
Once a vision
Saving you
Was her mission
She blames herself
For your death
At least your pain
Is put to rest

Think back
To a time
When everything
Wasn’t a sign
The last image
You see
Is a frame
Of your disease
Her picture is
Black and white
You exit this world
Without a fight
A bright
And blinding light
Comes from
A distant height
Sights flow
Like a dream
They’re characterizations
Of your screams
All the things
You will miss
Comes at you
Through the abyss
Your child
Who you’ll never meet
Is born
At her feet
Your pain
Is endless
There is never
Any rest
From the torture
Your being
Is more than her
It’s a song you sing
Track Name: Kill Myself
I never had a reason why I should stay alive
See the future, not that bright
I'm already dead inside
I might as well kill myself
Hurt my mom, hurt my dad, hurt every friend I had
Every joke in bad taste
Just a total fucking waste
I might as well kill myself
Without me, you will see how things are meant to be
Bad time every time
The biggest pain isn't mine
I'm so alone and I deserve to be
Track Name: Thespian
Religion is your crutch
I never knew a person could change so much
You go on about heaven's reach
But here on earth we all know you're a leach
Put on the mask
Get in the scene
The things that you say
You don't know what they mean
Now that we're here
Here at the end
As they say, I hope you break a leg
Present yourself as our friend
But depending on the crowd we were only a trend
Tell me I don't fit in with society
Shit, you only wish you did
You're just a fucking fraud
Your religion, your performance
Is all a facade
The act you put on is full of shit
You're not a thespian, you're a hypocrite
Track Name: Murder Me, Please
I hate my face
And what I see, I can't even recognize
I hate my mind
Misanthropy all the time
Fucking dick
Misogynist prick
Racist shit
Loner bitch
Murder me please
I'm on my knees
Murder me please
My personality is a disease
All that I am is the worst of me
Given the choice I choose not to be
How do I answer for what I've done
The final solution
My own assassination
Track Name: Human Sludge
I’m sad and lonely and nobody will fuck me
You are just
Human sludge
Everybody is shit; I’m dying, lonely and pale
In life it doesn’t matter if you’re kind and weak
The minute you try the world wants you to fail
I’m nothing but the blood of ground up meat
Sent to a factory, meant to die
They can only comfort, appease and lie
And when I’m gone pretend to cry

We are all
Human sludge
Waste flows from the cities where degenerates sleep
When they die black tar and white bones reform another
There are piles of bodies and rivers where blood runs deep
Everybody is drowning and dying together
Arm in arm as life is falling apart
My skin and grass are connected in rot
But if you complain you have no heart

I am just
Human Sludge
I can’t believe there was once a day
When I had real hope and dreams
I’m pissed and someone is going to pay
But my life is falling apart at the seams
I want to die but there’s so much pain I have left to see
Track Name: Mutual
Look at me but don't touch me
Kiss me but don't fuck me
Love without sex
Sex without love
The feeling is mutual
Why do I go through the motions
It creates romantic corrosion
You make no issue of fucking
It's something I take no part in
I am so hateful of myself
I wish I was in love with the world
Our difference is a chasm
Just because I don't orgasm
Track Name: Wish
I wish somebody would say my name
Just so I know they remembered me
I wish I could be part of something
Something that I could be proud of
I wish I knew what it felt like
To care for anything at all
I wish I was anywhere
But where I am right now
I wish I had a different life
But I’d know I’d die there too
I wish I could make you feel
As bad as I feel
I wish that I had the nerve
To pull the fucking trigger
But instead I’ll lie awake in bed
And do absolutely nothing at all

I wish I could break the walls
That surrounds my happiness
I wish people would stop and stare
Just so life wouldn’t be such a bore
I wish there was a single good thing
That was only for me
I wish the world only had white
So my black could be unique
I wish all the flowers would die
So the bleakness would bleed through
I wish that a bottomless pit
Would open up and swallow me whole
I wish I could beat the world
Just like it has beaten me
But instead I kill myself
With my anger and my fear

I wish I knew what to do
After my family grows old and dies
I wish I could control myself
From destroying every aspect of my life
I wish you could see my pain
Or if you could just look at me
I wish I could see something
Other than reflections of my hate
I wish I didn’t wake up
Every morning with myself
I wish I had a different life
But I’d know I’d cry there too
I wish I had a path
That didn’t lead me to loneliness
But I know I’ll die alone
And that is probably better for you

I wish I was a better person
I wish I was a better friend
I wish people would like me
I wish women would love me
I wish I could just go in the desert and die
I wish I was a better son
I wish I didn’t shit on every opportunity I got
I wish I didn’t fucking hate everything